Sunday, August 26, 2018

One remarkable woman




My mom was a remarkable woman who accomplished so much in her life. 

My grandparents were rightly proud of their intelligent and talented daughter, an excellent and well-rounded student who accepted the honour and duties of being the valedictorian for her high school graduating class. 

Marion met James Patrick -, fell head over heels, and married the love of her life not long out of high school.

As an only child, family was always important to Marion, and she would go on to be a mother to six, grandmother to 13, and great-grandmother to 8 (and counting). She loved us all, and did her best to be there for each of us. She even put aside funds for grandkids to help prepare them for the future and get them all off to a good start. She never forgot a birthday, and made sure every Christmas and Thanksgiving were special.

She made it a practice for us to try to focus on the positive. As kids growing up we said grace before our meals and nightly bedtime prayers. I remember we would often be called on to talk about what had gone well during the day, and what we had to be grateful for. When someone might have the audacity to say “nothing went well” my mom would say, “Come on, no one can live on God’s good green earth without at least one good thing happening to them during the day.” So she helped us to see the good each day could bring.

In addition to being a homemaker, Marion held lots of different paid jobs over the years: window dresser, graphic designer, advertising coordinator. She turned her creativity and dexterity to knitting and crochet and her designs were published in craft magazines. She worked as a child care provider for the Region, as a training specialist for Junior Achievement, worked for the Red Cross and St. John’s Ambulance, and later as a provider at Home Instead Senior Care. Many of these positions called on her compassion, patience, creativity and diligence.

Always a spiritual person, she was also a valued and active member of the Catholic church community here in K-W. 

She made lasting contributions as a volunteer and said the years spent with the St. Vincent de Paul Society introduced her to one very large group of caring and committed Christians, who were concerned with the plight of the hungry and homeless, and willing to give above and beyond ordinary efforts. She recalled the seven years spent building and establishing Marillac Place as eventful, exciting, and exhilarating.

Life brings challenges to us all and Marion faced hers with courage and fortitude, whether it was the sudden death of her beloved husband, the loss of her good friend Lou,  the trials and tribulations of her family, or her own personal struggles with health.

Last November my brothers and sister accompanied our Mom to the hospital, where was told she had an aggressive form of lung cancer that, left untreated, could mean she had as little as eight weeks' time remaining. We were all devastated. 

The medical system kicked in and soon she received medical appointments and advice, personal service worker visits, pain medication, water pills, heart pills, chemotherapy, pleurisy treatments, MRIs, CT scans, and more. 

Mom chose Expected Death in the Home, or EDITH, as the local health integrated network describes it. She knew it would not be easy but also made a conscious choice to make the best of her remaining days.

Some days were easier than others, as she struggled with breathing and painful symptoms, confronting the daily conditions of living with a terminal illness. The diagnosis was both a blessing and a curse, because we knew her death was coming we were able to make special occasions even more special this past year.

We weren’t sure how much time we would have left with her, so our family celebrated Christmas in early December, and again on Christmas day. We got together again for New Years. In January, we celebrated her birthday. We gathered together at Easter, and again on Mother’s Day. A feast and groaning boards at every occasion. 

Mom had a voracious appetite and enjoyed her food, sampling most everything and savouring each morsel. 

Day to day she continued preparing meals for herself and others. As the weather got warmer she would sit in the carport and visit with family and friends, taking in the fresh air and view of the flower garden. 

She wanted her children, her grandchildren, great-grand-children and their partners to know she loved them, and told us often.

She was always happy to have family, friends and neighbours stop by. 

Regular visits from the St. Aloysius community meant the world to her, as she received Communion and was anointed with last rights. Also very much appreciated were the visits from associates from Marallac and St. Vincent de Paul Society.

These last few months I came to know my mom better, and understand the depth of her love and compassion. 

As she was reflecting on her life she wrote, “Life has taught me that we are all in this together and the Golden Rule of ‘do unto others as you would have them do unto you’ is the rule that matters.”

She is an inspiration to all who knew her. Those that touch our lives .... stay in our hearts forever.

Mom, Grandma, Great-Grandma, Marian. Thank you. Your love will light our way.  Your memory will forever be with us.

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Bickers, Marion,
Only daughter of John & Ada Schlachter, died on August 21, 2018. She will be fondly remembered by her children and their families; her daughter Diane and her husband Rob Cowan; daughter Kathy and her late husband Dan Emery; her sons David and his wife Therese; Michael and his wife Karen; Alex and his partner Sue Taylor-Binsted; and her son Patrick. As well as by her 13 grandchildren: Daniel, John, Alex, Eric, Christopher, Sarah, Leo, Jessica, Robin, Emma, Olivia, Luke and Jared and 8 great-grandchildren Nicholas, Destiny, Terry, Mercedes, John Jr., William, Autumn and Araya. Predeceased by her husband James and her parents.
Marion's family will receive relatives and friends at Henry Walser Funeral Home, 507 Frederick Street, Kitchener, 519-749-8467 on Sunday, August 26, 2018 from 2:00 p.m. - 5:00 p.m. Prayers Sunday 4:30 p.m. at the funeral home. A funeral mass will take place at St. Aloysius R.C. Church, 11 Traynor Ave., Kitchener, on Monday, August 27, 2018 at 10:00 a.m. Reception to follow in the parish hall. Private cremation to take place. 
As expressions of sympathy, donations to St. Aloysius Church - Food Pantry or Marillac Place would be appreciated by the family (cards available at the funeral home).

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Very beautiful and touching post Diane. A great tribute to your Mom. It was a pleasure to meet her through your words. Hugs, Caroline Lafleur